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Through the Looking Glass
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after eponymous tale by L. Carroll
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Part Four
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While Alice, the King and the Messenger
were running to see fight between the
Unicorn and the Lion,
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Alice remembered the words of an old song:
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The Lion and the Unicorn
were fighting for the crown:
The Lion beat the Unicorn
all round the town
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Some gave them white bread,
some gave them brown:
Some gave them plum-cake
and drummed them out of town.
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- Does the one that wins get the crown?
- Dear me, no! What an idea!
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- Would you be good enough to stop a minute?
- Stop a minute? First you'd have to catch it,
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and I'm not strong enough;
it goes by so fearfully quick.
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Breeeaaaak! Ten minutes!
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- What—is—this?
- This is a child. A living child.
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I always thought they were fabulous monsters!
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Do you know, I always thought Unicorns
were fabulous monsters, too!
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Well, if you'll believe in me, I'll
believe in you. Is that a bargain?
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Yes, if you like.
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Then hand round the plum-cake, Monster!
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I don't understand! I've cut several slices
already, but they always join on again!
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You don't know how to manage Looking-glass
cakes. Hand it round first, and cut it afterwards.
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Lion's piece
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Alice couldn't make out where
the drumming came from.
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"Now they will be drummed out of town,"
thought Alice, "the sooner the better!"
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Ahoy! Ahoy! Check! You're my prisoner!
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Ahoy! Ahoy! Check!
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- She's my prisoner, you know!
- But then I came and rescued her!
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It was a glorious victory, wasn't it?
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I don't know. I don't want to be
anybody's prisoner. I want to be a Queen!
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So you will, when you've crossed
the next brook. I'll accompany you.
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I was wondering what the mouse-trap was for.
It's hard to imagine mice living on horses.
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Hard, yet possible. I wouldn't like
them running all about me.
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- I'm afraid you've not had much
practice in riding, yes?
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- I've had plenty of practice.
The great art of riding is...
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is to keep one's balance!
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My mind goes on working all the same.
the more head downwards I am,
the deeper are my thoughts.
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Are you sad? Let me sing you a song.
When I sing it, everyone either cries or...
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- Or what?
- Or doesn't cry!
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So many creatures live in my wood!
Hare and elk and badger.
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An old wood grouse, hearing a fox,
Flies onto a thick branch.
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A hedgehog I have, who hurried along
To dine with his good friends.
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Yet there is no elephant here in my wood,
There's no merry elephant here...
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A hedgehog embroiders my shirt with a cross
And sings me a song in deep bass.
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A dear fox scatters my yard with sand
And sweeps my room with her tail.
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A titmouse flies over my head as it tweets,
A gopher's my neighbor and friend.
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Yet there is no elephant here in my wood,
There's no merry elephant here...
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Look, there's your finish line.
Now I will leave you, my child.
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Won't you wave your handkerchief to me?
It may keep me from losing heart.
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Years afterwards, Alice could bring
the whole scene back again, as if it
had been only yesterday -
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the mild blue eyes and kindly smile of
the Knight, the setting sun gleaming
through his hair,
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and the black shadows of the forest behind.
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Ah, I never expected I should be a Queen so soon!
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Please, would you tell me...
- Speak when you're spoken to!
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You can't be a Queen, till you've
passed the examination!
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Here is an exercise in Division: Divide
a loaf by a knife — what's the answer?
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- I suppose.....
- Bread-and-butter, of course!
No try Subtraction:
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Take a bone from a dog: what remains?
- Nothing would remain.
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Wrong! The dog's temper would remain!
- How's that?
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- Tell me, what's the cause of lightning?
- The thunder! No, no, no! The other way.
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Oh, we had such a thunderstorm
last Friday!
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I mean one of the last set of Fridays!
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In our country,
there's only one Friday at a time.
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Hee-hee, that's a poor thin way
of doing things!
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Now here, we sometimes
take as many as five Fridays a week!
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By the way, I invite you to Alice's
dinner-party this afternoon.
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- And I invite you.
- I didn't know I was to have a party at all.
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But if there is to be one, I think
I ought to invite the guests.
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We gave you the opportunity of doing it,
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but I daresay you've not had
many lessons in manners yet.
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Reception is postponed till the week after next!
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To the Looking-Glass world
it was Alice that said,
"I've a sceptre in hand,
I've a crown on my head;
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Let the Looking-Glass creatures,
whatever they be,
Come and dine with the Red Queen,
the White Queen, and me."
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Let me introduce you:
Alice—Mutton; Mutton—Alice.
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- May I give you a slice?
- Certainly not!
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It isn't etiquette to cut any one
you've been introduced to.
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Remove the joint!
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I won't be introduced to the pudding,
please! Or we shall get no dinner at all!
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Pudding—Alice; Alice—Pudding.
Remove the pudding!
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To queen Alice's health!
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Here I am!
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Enough! Enough, I said! Stop this at once!
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As for you, I'll shake you
into a kitten!
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"I had such a wonderful dream,
but Kitty woke me," thought Alice.
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And she was with me in the Looking-Glass world.
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But of course! The Black Queen was Kitty!
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But Kitty only purred in reply, and
pretended it hadn't heard Alice.
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It is a very inconvenient habit of kittens
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that, whatever you say to them,
they always purr.
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I hear you saying: "like fairy-tale living"
But judge for yourselves: is that easily lived?
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You can't do a thing here without being cautious,
Because of uncertainly and of obscurity,
And lack of knowledge and unpleasantness...
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Oh, it's so complicated!
And that's where the fun is!
You can't take one step here without taking care.
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I raced through the story
on a path of danger,
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I wanted to quickly
Reach the denouement.
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Now, the denouement's here,
And I'm a bit sorry
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Recalling my story
As I'm growing up.